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Rubbish Radio Comedy starring Reece Dinsdale
Information about the BBC Radio 4 comedy programme Rubbish, with cast list, transmission dates and episode details and guide:
Rubbish is a BBC Radio 4 comedy series written by Tony Bagley. It was first broadcast in October 2006. The sitcom centres around a character called Martin Christmas who is played by Reece Dinsdale. Martin is a cynical local government officer cynic who suffers from manic depression.
Rubbish Episode Guide
Episode 1: Diversity - In local government no one can hear you scream. Martin thinks too deeply during the local action planning meeting whilst Roger thinks outside the box about recycling. Martin jokingly says Here Comes The Rubbish Bus and the slogan is adopted.
Martin is in search for inner peace and cannot shake of the little known fifth horseman of the apocalypse - embarrassment. He has to come up with slogans for his Rubbish Bus and is plagued by Pagans in the Youth and Leisure Department trying to recruit him but all he can think about is why do thick people enter TV quizzes. Things get no better when he argues with a builder with eight degrees.
At the annual diversity workshop Sarah delves into the private life of Martin. Barney calls Sarah the Chief of the Thought Police and breaks down crying when he talks about his mistresses.
Back at work Marty has to deal with the effects of working with a man in a permanent state of arousal and he forgets to order the Rubbish Bus free gifts. Then to top it all, he keeps seeing the image of a bloke with a metal plate in his jaw.
At the next diversity meeting Sarah decides to offload about her previous boyfriend to Martin and things develop between them.
Originally broadcast on Thursday 5 October 2006 23:00-23:30
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Burnt Vengeance - How will a dying patient in a hospice take his revenge? What are his final wishes and what will his solicitor reveal when she reads out his Last Will and Testament?
5-star author C.G. Buswell brings another story from his dark, tempestuous mind. Burnt Vengeance will have you screaming for the light and grappling with your imagination as you try to quell your fear.
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Episode 2: Whistleblower - It's all about visibility and the local action team is not seen when Roger is out and about. Sticky buns will help the team.
The local reporter, Adam Monk, pursues the story about the Dalek of Death compost bin. Children love these Dalek compost bins and climb in them, but then get stuck. The reporter has a local government whistleblower - a rival to Martin Christmas his regular whistleblower. Can he unearth the new whistleblower? Will he be distracted by tales of wife swapping parties amongst local government officials? Was Martin shopped because he is seeing Sarah, a former lover of Scott? Or it is because of their role playing submissive games?
Can Martin get Scott and Adam to kill each other in a J D Wetherspoon? Martin confronts Scott who denies that he is the phantom whistleblower. Is there an enemy within Waste Management? Suddenly local government is a very threatening place...
Originally broadcast on Thursday 12 October 2006 23:00-23:30
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Episode 3: Excited - Martin gets excited at work over news of the department being able to afford another electric float for the roadside recycling scheme and disgusts himself. His friends feel the same way and embarrassment the fifth horseman of the Apocalpyse, rides past. He confides to Wadey Huberman the youth trainee who is wise beyond his years.
At home Marty meets his new neighbours, Naomi and David, the perfect couple who encourage him to take control of his life by touching the void, rather than staring at the abyss. Marty lets go of Mr Boring and becomes Mr Exciting but taking control of your own life is harder than it looks - especially when it involves scaling the fire-fighter's climbing tower - naked. Well it was one way to overcome the anti climb paint and see naked fire fighters sunbathing! It's also a great way to get in front of a magistrate.
On his day at court Marty has a black eye thanks to a fight at the paper bank over a copy of the yellow pages. His spare pair of yellow boxer shorts doesn't save him from a £200 fine. Martin decides to turn off the excitement button and gets drunk with Superboy Wadey and his neighbours who suggest Wadey do something naughty and exciting whilst in the nude...
Originally broadcast on Thursday 19 October 2006 23:00-23:30
Episode 4: Chilling - Martin takes his blood pressure and finds it high - but why is he not dead? Barney enlightens him on his tips to avoid work and the associated stress it brings. Then he hears about a council car park being used for dogging - with the waste bins being used for these acts of debortury. Is it a good idea to go dogging with Sensei Matt? Or should he stay at home and work on Sarah's dismal sense of humour and performance?
Sarah decides that they should have particapary abstinence in their sex life. Martin decides she must be ovulating when she suggests she will build a no sex website. He soon finds himself being stimulated...by nothing! Not even the eroticised crystals. So he goes on the doggin mission with Matt. Things don't improve when he plays Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner in his car CD player while they wait for hot car parking action. They are soon joined by other cars and the car headlights soon turn on. Andrea and Barry the King and Queen of dogging in the South Downs soon turn up and Martin denies being a stalker or voyeur. Barry may have a body of an Adonis but Martin is overjoyed to hear he has a lisp. Can Martin get over the night of debortury? Sarah helps by suggesting they have no sex with sex!
Originally broadcast on Thursday 26 October 2006 23:00-23:30
Episode 5: Rage - Martin Christmas goes along to a life editing course to please his on and off girlfriend Sarah, the course tutor. The first class is about people shaped holes. She shares with the group the detritus left by the hole of Scott, her ex boyfriend. Flashbacks are holding back the groups lifehold whilst memories are good. Can the group climb every mountain? It is worse than a combination of the duff episodes of Stat Trek and Desert Island Discs.
Sarah blames Martin for the First World War and the demise of her class. Martin wishes he could say no and takes his problem to Barney who discusses a cure for shy bladder syndrome.
It seems that people have no trouble at all saying no to Martin. He is still getting hate e-mail from Chris Mace. He can't even say no to a drink with the office bore Peter Crocker who has a problem with constant excitement and loves remote controlled model planes. Peter makes an excuse and leaves Martin - he finds him too boring!
A rubbish rage incident is sparked over yoghurt tubs in kerbside plastic recycling.
Sarah and Martin have a heart to heart and are interrupted by Chris Mace in the flesh. They have an arguement about a pagan ritual and Martin announced he is a Christian and soon starts to dig a hole for himself over religion. He calls his church the Free Ascension of the Martyrs who amputate fingers of church goers. Chris hastily leaves. Sarah witnesses all this and decides Martin still needs to work on his people shaped hole.
Back at work Martin is put in charge of recycling road rage attacks, with Scott's help.
Originally broadcast on Thursday 2 November 2006 23:00-23:30
Episode 6: Rubbish - The birds are singing and Martin saw a mobile doggy wash on his way to work. Can things get any better? No, they get worse when the department gets an outsourcing partner. Roger, Martin's boss, has his computer taken away as part of a world-wide sting operation by the FBI. It seems he went native and couldn't stop turning things around. Even the CIA and the Prime Minister of Great Britain are involved. People are disappearing mysteriously and Martin questions the moon landings and realises conspiracy theories about Princess Diana could be true.
Martin is promoted because of his can do ability. He soon finds himself acting head of Waste and Recycling with a task to keep the dream alive. One hour later he regrets betraying his working class roots and asks Barney if he would like the job and the office. Is outsourcing about to go Global?
Scott feels guilty about getting back with Sarah, Martin's ex boyfriend and tries to make amends by becoming Martin's fashion guru to help him in his new managerial position.
Martin meets the outsourcing partner from hell and begins to realise he is in over his head. Things are made worse when Karen makes his life unbearable because he refused her advances. Martin decides to embrace his new job with his can do attitude and decides to scrap the rubbish brush, a recycling bin for food you cannot open and a glass bank for recycling blue bottles.
why do people on heat talk like children about furry animals? Will the sweet talk of Barney and Karen put Martin off his banoffee pie.
Can Martin learn a lesson or will he terminate an agreement with a million pound cancellation clause? He suffers nightmares and flashbacks involving Darth Vader and Brad Pitt. Has it all got too much for Martin?
Originally broadcast on Thursday 9 November 2006 23:00-23:30. This was the last episode of the first series.
Cast List For Rubbish
Martin Christmas - Reece Dinsdale
Roger Bryce- Paul Copley
Sarah - Nicola Walker (Pippa Haywood in series 2)
Barney - James Lance (Matthew Cottle in series 2)
Adam York - Paul Reynolds
Karen - Oriane Messina
Don - Mark Maier
Bryan Kent - Neil Edmond
Chris Mace - Jim North
Scott York - Kevin Eldon
Alan - Mike Walling
Wadey - Steven Kynman
Naomi - Katherine Jakeways
David, The Tannoy Voice and the Fell Walker - Martin Trenaman
Matt Jessop - Robert Willford
Andrea - Susie Donkin
John - Neil Dudgeon
Dawn - Emma Kennedy
Little Girl - Nicole Shortland
Peter Crocker -
Loud American, Banks and Binbagger - Ewan Bailey
Tristana - Katy Brand
Saffron - Nadia Kamil
Compere - Ewan Bailey
Dan - Russell Tovey
Writer - Tony Bagley
Producer - Claire Bartlett
Trivia About Rubbish
Reece Dinsdale will be familiar to television viewers from the John Thaw comedy Home To Roost where he played Matthew Willows. He recently played vet Rick Johnson in The Chase on BBC1.
Nicola Walker starred in the spy series Spooks as Ruth Evershed and D.I. Susan Taylor in Touching Evil
More Radio Trivia.
Series two of Rubbish
A new radio series of Rubbish started on Wednesday 31 October at 11pm. It once again starred Reece Dinsdale as Martin Christmas though some of the other cast were changed and new characters were introduced. They are listed in the cast list of Rubbish above. Series two of Rubbish was written by Tony Bagley.
Episode 1: Insomnia was first broadcast on BBC Radio4 FM on Wednesday 31 October 2007 at 11pm until 11:30pm. Martin Christmas is just as cynical, still a local government officer and still a manic depressive. What has changed though is that he now has a new boss called John (played by actor Neil Dudgeon) who enjoys winding up Martin and believes in micro management. Things are not helped when Martin cannot get a good nights sleep because his neighbour’s cat is keeping him awake. He cannot remember when he last had a good night’s sleep. He renames it the cat from hell because it has evil demonic powers. The cat's torture techniques maximises the suffering of other cats and keeps disturbing Martin's sleep.
Martin cannot contain his excitement when he teaches a class of year four to recycle. He adds some excitement by telling them their parents are to blame for murdering the planet with their 4x4 cars.
Martin becomes short with complainers to the council which includes people complaining about microchips in wheelie bins and fortnightly refuse collections. He gets reported when he is rude to a councillor and gets the job of finding ozone depleting items in the office.
Martin accidentally runs over the cat but the accident is witnessed by a ten year old girl who gives him advise to cover up the crime. Martin puts the dead cat in his boot against the advise of the girl. She makes him feel guilty and even tells him that its name was Carrington. He puts the body in the green recycling wheelie bin which later gets collected and Martin gets a £100 penalty fine for a recycling offence.
Episode 2: Liar was first broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Wednesday 7November 2007 from 11pm until 11:30pm. Martin Christmas of the Rubbish radio programme is trapped in his bathroom. Though he lives alone he still locks the door and is now locked in. What can he do? He dangles his electric razor out of the bathroom window in the hope that someone sees it and will call the emergency services. It doesn't work so he talks to God, and his neighbour hears him and knocks down the door. Now that he is free he breaks his pact with God to feed the homeless at Christmas or to go to an orphanage to Romania with toys in a large track. Martin's boss phones to ask why he is late and laughs when he hears he had a terrible ordeal locked in his toilet.
When he gets to the office Martin Christmas' colleagues tease him about locking the toilet when he lives alone and getting locked in. He only gets 4 out of 10 for his excuse for being late and Barney explains he needs to invent a more entertaining reason for being late rather than being honest.
Martin Christmas thinks he is suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder when a colleague tells him that signals from deep space from intelligent alien life happened when he was locked in the loo. He falls for this first contact joke from Tristana and realises he is still being teased for his absence. She gets a 7 from Scott.
His ex girlfriend Sarah tells him she used the late excuse of seeing a new breed of wild cows. She is now going out with Scott and becomes angry and jealous that Scott gave Tristana a 7.
Barney is late in from work the next day and blames it on being kicked out of his home by Karen. Martin gives him a 4 but Barney is telling the truth and calls Scott unfeeling. The trouble is Martin is not convinced and quizzes him about his story. John the new manager questions him too about his lateness and senses a dumbing down of excuses. The office explodes in a variety of lies and excuses. Scott and his girlfriend have a big argument in the office and Martin gives him a 6, the trouble is Martin still has not caught on and the break up is for real.
Martin wants to get out of a meeting and Sarah suggests he becomes a liar and invite a whopping excuse to get out of the naming and shaming meeting at the Town Hall. He can't seem to get the hand of being a liar until the last moment when he invents medical conditions. He is told to stop playing the liar game and get on the coach - the meeting is in Scotland and he is seated next to the two most boring men from the office. Martin blames himself for breaking his promises with God.
Episode 3: Rant was first broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Wednesday 14 November 2007 from 11pm until 11:30pm. Martin's colleagues point out his bad habit of talking to himself. Barney thinks it is because he lives alone. Martin Christmas says it is a rant, not talking to oneself.
Martin Christmas joins ex girlfriend Sarah (now played by actress Pippa Haywood in series 2) and her new boyfriend Scott on a sponsored walk to Bronte Country but regrets his decision. He rants and walks during the weekend.
Scott compares back backing and fell walking fashion. The trio meet Bronte fans and Sarah wants to visit the Bronte Parsonage. Martin starts to rant about Bronte and upsets some Americans in the Gastro Pub they have visited for lunch. He starts ranting about America. They leave.
The American is following them over the hills so the hill walking trio go off the path to shake off their stalker. They worry over who he is and their paranoia goes wild, except for Martin who sees the situation for what it is - a sponsored walk. They soon bump into other walkers and Sarah and Scott shout for help. They run off and the trio remain lost, though their stalker is still following them. They hide in fetid Jack's cave.
Scott breaks down and the stalker finds them. Martin instantly apologises and begs him to leave them alone. The stalker reveals what he wants - to return a map they dropped. They go to another gastro pub which is the same one they left. Martin has been leading them round in circles.
Episode 4: Surveillance was first broadcast on BBC Radio4 on Wednesday 21 November 07 from 11pm until 11:30pm. Martin Christmas of the Rubbish radio programme becomes the latest victim of the new tannoy system that operates in conjunction with the CCTV system. How will Martin clear his name from the third offence of littering whilst testing the system? Still upon successful testing John, the new boss, compliments Martin for the first time. Now on a roll he runs past some ideas to make refuse collection more efficient.
Dawn Pepper head of the Green or Clean team refuses to delete Martin's photo from the database of criminal offences, even though he was testing the new system.
Martin and Barney are moved to the main office. Barney is not happy because he does not cope with people and thinks Martin has Stockholm Syndrome because he always thinks John knows best. Well ever since he complimented him.
Whilst surfing the net, on Council time, Martin find a site called binbagger that is an anarchist site against rubbish.
Barney is told off for smoking, going to the toilet more than twice in the morning and once in the afternoon and not wearing a tie. He then gets picked on by Banks the office bully. Banks consider it an initiation into the main office. He then tells Martin that John got Martin to drop the rubbish deliberately in front of the facial recognition software so that he's have three strikes and out. Barney finds a friendly in a spider until Banks swats it dead.
Someone has shopped the litter dropping CCTV and tannoy system to Bin Bagger ad he berates John publicly. Barney thinks Martin Christmas is Bin Bagger. But Bin Bagger has a London accent and so does Banks...
Episode 5: Couples was first broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Wednesday 28 November 2007 from 11pm until 11:30pm. What is more sad than an unfunny man that thinks he is funny. Martin's friend and neighbour David has a gig as a stand up comic but pans. His wife Naomi is far from sympathetic and they argue in front of Martin Christmas. It seems he is now acting as an agony aunt. Though he feels like a wrestling referee when couples start to argue at work. Martin is tempted to give out bad advice so that people will stop using him as an agony aunt.
Martin is volunteered to give an award to a one hundred year old bin man.
Naomi comes round to apologise for bickering and gives Martin a bottle of wine. Martin invites her in and worries that she wants more free advice. Martin releases his bad agony aunt advice demon and he goes over to the dark side and suggests she have an affair. Naomi tells Martin that David is away on business and throws herself at Martin. He immediately regrets releasing bad agony aunt as Naomi tells him that they have thought about an open marriage. He escapes having an affair with Naomi by suggesting she talk to David first.
Back at the office Martin continues to be a bad agony aunt as he suggests to Scott's girlfriend that he needs to push the envelope and perform at the open mic event at the Comedy Club.
His manager thinks that Martin needs to write a risk assessment before offering advice.
David and Naomi return hoping for a threesome with Martin though Martin resorts back to good agony aunt to offer them marriage guidance.
Episode 6: Phobic was first broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Wednesday 5 December 2007 from 11pm until 11:30pm. In the last episode of the Rubbish radio programme Martin Christmas is unable to look himself in the eye in his mirror and see his reflection. Is it because he sees himself as a time served bureaucrat or does he fear he is getting old. Who is Martin Christmas will soon be replaced with What does martin Christmas look like? He even forgets that he now has a beard.
br>Martin seeks help from Dan, a local artist who is friends with Sarah, while Barney ponders were red elastic bands come from. Meanwhile their manager wonders why there is an obesity epidemic but yet so much waster food needs to be collected by the Rubbish team.
Dan is an agoraphobic and Martin tells him above his Eisoptrophobia - a fear of looking in mirrors. Dan sets out to realise Martin artistically but Martin is uncomfortable in the thong he makes him wear and the body strips he paints onto him. Dan agrees to help him change - into a loincloth.
Everyone loves Martin's painting and he starts to be more comfortable with himself. Though art critics notice his premature naval hernia and the artist wonders whether he should have painted two navels. The artist gets a grant and soon school children arrive to see the artwork.
Barney is promoted to sustainability manger whilst Martin becomes compost manager after the first wave of redundancies. Their manager says this will give them a new position to put onto their CV, just before they are made redundant in the second wave of redundancies.
Martin’s first job in his new role if to talk to school children about National composting week. The children just keep giggling and slowly it dawns on martin that these are the school children who attended his art exhibition.
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